• 1 crying baby named Junior
• 1 cup of water
• 1 teaspoon of granulated sugar
• 1 bottle

Hand Junior to a responsible adult or lie face up in a baby bassinette. Go to the kitchen and immediately rinse out an empty baby bottle. Fill half way with warm water.

Take one tablespoon of white sugar and put in the bottle. Screw the top back on. Shake really hard for 2.5 seconds.

Return to Junior and stick bottle in mouth. Repeat often or until feeding time. Remember to take baby to dentist the minute his teeth turn brown.